"When Fails the Quest!" (Tales To Astonish #74, 1966)

Hark, my hearties! Smilin' Stan was never one to take the easy way out, title-wise! Most other comics composers mighta penned this pulse-pounding pen-paean as somethin' along the lines of "The Failed Quest!"
Not our Supreme Stan! He knows what udder the drama drips from! And he chooses that udder and milks it 'til it's dryer than Texas toast!
"When Fails the Quest!" 'Tis sheer poetry, effendi! A phrase to be savored like a snifter of fine wine (or, for you believers on a budget, a tin can of grape pop!)
Dig the destruction of Gene Colan's lithesome linework by genuine goodfella Vivacious Vince Coletta! When ol' Vince wasn't takin' orders from "The Maggia," he was layin' waste to page after page of pencils by the greats of the mighty Marvel stable!
Countless pages of Jack "King" Kirby's work were ruined by ol' Vince's pithy pen! What he does to Genial Gene's impressionist sketches shouldn't happen to a fella sportin' cement overshoes! Sheesh!
When fails the pen.... in Vigorous Vince's paws, that's all the time, amigo!

"Lo! The Eggs Shall Hatch!" (Strange Tales 145, 1965)

Assemble, faithful followers! Harken to the didactic drama of this stunnin' splash page! Natch, you've latched onto the all-too-blatant similarities 'twixt the title of this babblin' blog and the moniker of this nutty narrative!
Dig the dramatic use of "Lo!"--the very essence of all that can be called "Pretentioustan!"
While you're at it, effendi, latch thine eyes onto that zany, wig-flippin' image of cyber-goodies bein' loaded into the think-tank of a fake Nick Fury. You can't, er, shield your eyes from this swingin' sight!
For students of comics-gone-wrong, you can't beat the combo of  Jack "King" Kirby havin' his dynamic drawings mutiliated by the likes of Don "Aw" Heck and Mickey "Why The Alias" Demeo.
Note closely, effendi, how these ink-slingin' sunza-beaches sap all the life out of Jolly Jack's pulsating pencils. Ol' Jack fared even worse, in the hapless hands of Paul "Rancid" Reinman and George "Taco" Bell (AKA Roussos--a formerly good artist in the '40s whose talents took a nosedive in the early '50s and only got worse with time)!
Lo, the eggs shall hatch, pilgrims. And, let's face it, some of 'em are bound to be rotten! SALUT!

"He Who Holds The COSMIC CUBE!" (Tales of Suspense #80, 1967)

Might as well face it, minions--you're hooked on overkill! That's why you're here, chum... you can't get enough of that overwhelming, omniscient OVER-STATEMENT that packs a priapic punch in Stan's niftiest names for "his" scintillatin' sagas!
The Shatner Rule holds like Crazy-Glue for this titanic title! Dig that drama, effendi! Savor the awesome alliteration--the revved-up resonance of those collidin' consonants!
Imagine "The Shat" sayin' the monstrous moniker for this substantial saga over... an' over... an' over again!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!
HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!    HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!  HE...WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!  HE... WHO HOLDS THE... COSMIC... CUBE!       

"Enter...The TUMBLER!" (Tales of Suspense #83, 1967)

Greetings, pilgrims! Let's face it--this one is a hoot! Stan the Man dug slappin' the superlatives on his passel of passe super-villains! This one's no exception!
"Enter... The TUMBLER!" is, verily, a jolting joule of dazzling drama. These very words send tingles down the spine--nay, they electrify your ever-lovin' soul!
I don't know 'bout you, effendi, but this reporter has a hard time gettin' excited about anyone who dares call himself "The Tumbler!" Sheesh--Stan coulda tried just a little bit harder, eh?
Or mebbe this crackpot character came from the panicky pencil and manic mind of "The King" himself! Let's never forget to give Kirby the props for creation of characters, concepts, plots--sheesh, the whole ever-lovin' shebang!--in his Marvel stories.
Here at Pretentioustan HQ, we get a big bang outta the misplaced drama in this titanic, tremulous title.
May it brighten your day like a stack of high-falutin' dynamite! Excelsior!

"Lo, There Shall Be An Ending!" (Fantastic Four #43, 1961)

Let this then be a sign...
In mind's ear, hear ye the voice of the man whom men call "THE SHAT"...?

Truly then... YOUR AIM BE FOUND!

"IF A MAN BE MAD!" (Tales of Suspense #68, 1965)

Blessed be the birth of the staggering, senses-reeling malarkey wrought rightly by "The Man"--he who is called... STAN!
Sadly shrouded in awful obscurity... relegated to the lower depths of this cosmic cover, "If A Man Be Mad" presenteth the Stan Lee school of drama at its most fulsome, at its least fulfilling.
Thus it is... and verily, shall it be!

"LESS THAN MONSTER MORE THAN MAN!" (Tales to Astonish #83, 1966)

Pulses pounding properly? Effendi, your eyes have not yet seen the true and shining light! Let this masticating masterwork featuring the emerald awe of...the Incredible HULK!... transport thee from the mere realms of mortal man and into the flying fracas of amazing... FANTASY!

"THIS MAN... THIS MONSTER!" Fantastic Four #51, 1966

Lo, this title be... stunning! Let its drama--its sheer shrieking superbity--penetrate thy faithful skulls, pilgrims! Let's face it--this one's got PUNCH! 'Nuff said, effendi!